CHESS director and veteran homeschool mom Tara Taylor shares about her decision to homeschool through high school—standing up against cultural pressure, intentionally re-defining education, and creating a place where homeschooling families can learn and grow together.  

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Like many other families homeschooling high school, your initial plan was to encourage your children to dual enroll in the local community college (NOVA) during their high school years—what led to you change paths? 

I was pushing my kids academically in our homeschool because they were capable of advanced level work. I don’t really know where the thought originated, but somehow, I had the notion that accelerating their education was the thing to do. I thought we would dual-enroll at Northern Virginia Community College in high school, they would get their associate’s degree at 18, and then move on to a 4-year school—effectively saving us two years of college education funding – hooray!

Then I had a conversation with a homeschooling friend whose kids enrolled at NOVA as high school juniors. She shared that while they managed the work academically, it placed them with peers who were two years ahead of them socially. I saw that as a disadvantage. I wanted my kids to enjoy being high school students in high school and college students in college, giving them time to mature socially. I realized that once they were out of school, they would move into working world, presumably for the rest of their lives. I didn’t want to rush them into that.

“I saw that as a disadvantage. I wanted my kids to enjoy being high school students in high school and college students in college, giving them time to mature socially.”

My kids were certainly rising to the challenge but I [came to a point] where I re-checked this and decided to give them a lighter schedule so that they could slow down, taking more time to enjoy relationships, serve at our church, and practice leadership. I allowed them to take more “fun” classes such as art, music, and electives – subjects that I wish we had taken more time with when they were younger. Ultimately, I wanted to instill in my kids a lifelong love of learning. I think slowing our pace helped us accomplish that. 

Can you tell us more about pressure you felt to push your children academically? 

Some of the pressure I felt was self-induced. Every parent wants their child to excel in life. I think that due to the nature of homeschooling and our ability to focus and direct our child’s education, we can find ourselves pushing our kids academically. I was doing that without realizing it at times. I think we need to stop and ask ourselves, “what am I doing – what is driving my decisions?”  

Our culture says that if you want to get a good paying job later then you need to do really well academically. I don’t disagree—a college education is valuable—but I think you can lose your joy in the process of learning if that’s what you’re focused on. 

I believe that we need to examine why we are getting an education and what is the ultimate goal of our education. Is the goal just that we will get a job or is the journey more important than the outcome? I appreciate the folks who helped me check my motives and ask, “okay, what is my vision?”

What do you feel an education should provide? 

I think the purpose of education is to grow our character, our understanding of people and the world, and our understanding of God. As we are studying “subjects”, I believe we are really studying the nature of God. If you’re studying literature, you are learning about communication, if you’re studying math, you are learning about order and processes, if you are studying art and music you are discovering beauty and taking part in creating. Education is really a discovery of the nature of God and man.  

If you could give a word of encouragement to parents who are deciding to homeschool high school or who are in the middle of it, what would you say? 

To those who are thinking about homeschooling, I would say you can homeschool through high school! You can provide your kids with an excellent education that will prepare them for college and beyond. Directing your child’s education is a privilege and worth the effort you will put into the process. Your family’s values are worth passing on to your kids. I am so glad that I homeschooled. It was a joy to spend time with my kids and learn alongside them. 

“Directing your child’s education is a privilege and worth the effort you will put into the process. Your family’s values are worth passing on to your kids.”

To those who are in the middle of it, I would say neither your student’s high school education, nor the college they will attend is the most important thing in their life. Who they are as a person is what matters most. Enjoy them not because of how they perform, but because they are yours. In a crisis we may think “oh no, the whole world will end if my kid doesn’t [fill in the blank].” But in the end, it’s not the end of everything. Everyone is in process.

We need to look past this thing called “high school” into the future, and ask ourselves “what am I aiming for?” Am I aiming to grow a person into someone who will love and serve the Lord, and be a blessing to other people? What is the best way to get there? We can get caught up in something that seems like it has greater value than it actually has—education. I value a good education and am very passionate about getting a good one, and providing that for our kids, but it’s not the end all of everything. Our relationship with God and others is more valuable than school. 

What is one lesson that homeschooling has taught you?

The first lesson that God taught me when I started homeschooling my youngest child is that I could not do it in my own strength. I thought my child’s education would just happen. I would either take him to the school bus to go to the local elementary school, or I would teach him at home. We decided to teach at home, and I muddled through kindergarten confused and trying hard to wrap my mind around “teaching” shapes, colors, numbers, and thinking about the responsibility I was taking on. The next year I found myself trying to teach first grade to a little boy whose three-year-old brother kept placing a plastic action figure on the table which would constitute the end of our formal instruction for the rest of the day. It took me one-and-one-half years to complete first grade! 

It was during those frustrating days that I realized I needed to depend on God to homeschool. I started praying about “school” and seeking God’s help. Each year I asked myself, “Are we going to do this again?” We did wind up continuing, right through high school. And, my kids went on to lead normal lives! They both pursued a college education and are now married and earning a living. To me the great value of homeschooling was spending time with my children and really getting to know them. If I had the chance to do it again, I would—in a heartbeat!